As awful as it may sounds, I am grateful that Christmas was over. Honestly, it was just terrible. The selfishness and the attitudes and the memories, everything about those two days was terrible.

I feel like I'll never be warm again. 40 degrees, and dropping. Nothing but rain and grey skies.

I don't know how to reach out to people anymore, if I ever did. I don't know how to open up my heart to anyone. There's this big ole wall that I've built, that everyone has helped me build. Every single stone has a name, an incident. The only feelings I have are those of misery, regret, frustration, and fury.